Lair of thought

I have always wondered why people argue. Conventional wisdom (mine that is :-)) says that an argument is for the purpose of informing the other person of your point of view and understanding why the other person disagrees with you. It stops becoming an argument when the idea of the argument is to convince the person that you are right. Convincing a person, I believe, should only be the product of making your point rather than the goal. There are several strategies we use to win over an argument. Some I use and other I have run into over time. Here are some of them listed in no particular order. 1. Start the argument with a blanket judgment on the other person’s opinion This usually starts with something like "That is just stupid" or "I can’t believe you said that". The argument begins with the assumption that my opinion is not worth any merit and the only reason the argument is even happening is because I need to be convinced of what is right. There is no pretense o...

I was waiting at the optician’s office wondering what she would have to say. I had been experiencing some sort of a headache every evening on the days I was at work. It is not the sort that worries you but rather nags you. I wondered if it was something serious or if it was just that my vision had deteriorated to a point where I needed new glasses. She walked out and announced that my vision had improved leaving me completely stunned. She said that my vision had improved ever so slightly and that there was no need to changes my glasses. So I quipped her on the reason for the nagging headache and she simply brushed it away saying that it is because I work on the computer for long periods of time. She suggested that I don’t wear my glasses (short-sighted) while I work on the computer. She also suggested that I look away from the screen once in a while so that my eyes do not get strained. Strained eyes usually cause a nagging headache and she said that I need to look away and blink a few ...

What is self-confidence derived from? Every time you come across a person with a lot of it, you wonder what makes them so confident of their own selves. Sometimes I look at these people and find no reason that they should exude such confidence and yet they are there standing before me talking and doing things with reckless abandon. Most times I conclude that it is success in their lives, success at school, success at work and an overall successful life to that point that leads to such unbridled confidence. But I sit back and wonder and very rarely agree with this conclusion. There are several people that I have interacted with, that have not really been that successful but yet they have no self doubt. I used to work for a person who was the picture of self belief. He truly believed in everything that he proposed. His vision and ideas were hardly ever in doubt and yet this man had come off a failed project and was currently in a very questionable project (In terms of it possibility of s...